Are We There Yet?

June will make 1 year since we packed up our nice little life and moved back to Surry County where we grew up. With the birth of our second child, we wanted to live closer to family. It was important to us for our kids to grow up with a close relationship with their grandparents.

I figured that as soon as we moved back everything would fall into place. Instead, it took Brian a year to find employment, Benjamin went through a horrible case of the terrible 2s, and we are all still mourning the death of my grandma who passed away April 2009.

The adjustment has not been easy. In fact, we have yet to truely adjust at all. While some good things have come from this move, there is one that I for one can not come to terms with...I miss my job! I can not believe those words are coming from me. When I left Kings Creek School last March for bedrest and maternity leave, I left a large chunk of my heart behind. One might think that is strange because I have left jobs before, teaching jobs in other counties even, and never looked back. I had something special at KCS that simply does not exist anywhere else on this planet.

I don't quite know how to cope with this loss. It was not just a job. I made friends there like none other in my life. I miss my daily talks with Amanda. I even miss having a principal that didn't make me want to cuss under my breath. I felt more connected and committed to the families and students there more than any other. At Kings Creek I felt supported in my personal convictions, which is unheard of in the NC education community.

Don't think that I haven't loved being home with my new baby Jacob. It has been a dream come true. I just miss that sense of home and belonging. Something that takes time to develop.

Being here is not a bad thing at all. There are lots of positives. Change is always a challenging. A few pros are that we have reconnected with our church family here in Dobson, seeing our parents as often as we want, and even more so the kids seeing our parents. This has been a good time of reflection as I know I have grown much closer to God as well as my husband.

Bottom line, in the 8 years Brian and I have been married, we have moved 6 times! We hoped this was our last move. I am pretty certain this is where we will call home. Just ready for it to feel like it. So are we home yet? Yes, we are getting there.

Home is not a house. It is a feeling.